I had the sensation of watching from the top of the ceiling. I kept yelling at them not to give up. I wasn't dead but they couldn't hear me. Then I saw myself being placed in a coffin and the lid shutting. I watched my funeral and after it was over I saw the coffin with me in it being lowered into the ground. I had the actual sensation of the dirt covering me and the rock falling in my coffin. The next thing I remember is coming to in a hospital bed very ill and in a very drugged state of consciousness which lasted for several days. This was very confusing to me and I considered it a side effect from the ether they had given me. After that whenever I'd smell ether or strong hospital smells I'd have panic attacks and faint.

My actual near death happened shortly after the birth of my last son in July of 1979. His birth was very quick and uneventful. Ten days later however I had severe cramping and began to hemorrhage again. I made it to the hospital where a d&c was performed but before that happened I was given several pints of blood. I must have been in a bad way because I was told later that I'd been given all the blood in our small hospital and a police car was notified in a neighboring town to bring more blood. Due to the crisis they administered the blood without cross-matching it. All seemed fine for a while and then I began having an allergic reaction. My fever shot up to 107. I was covered in plastic sheets and buckets of ice were dumped on me. I was shaking violently and my feet were cold so they put heated blankets on them and some of the hospital staff were holding them down trying to stop me from shaking so hard. I was in a great deal of pain. Then I felt as if I was beginning to bleed again and I said to the doctor, "I'm bleeding again" and he said "no your not."  I felt myself leaving my body; it was a very physical experience.

The first feeling I had was "no pain." Then I found my self surrounded by PURE LOVE and I felt as if I was being embraced by Jesus. I can not tell you what he looked like but I knew who I was with. He told me it was not my time to be there and I should go back. I did not want to do that. I remember seeing my life review and I was ashamed but when I turned to Christ I was greeted with pure love and I was guiltless. I asked him how that could be and he told me that as a mortal I'd behaved as a mortal and there was no judgement from him. I then asked him why we were not speaking the way we speak on earth and he told me that in the spirit world we communicated through our hearts and feelings so that there could never be any misunderstanding. Again he encouraged me to return because he said that "I needed to raise my sons." I told him that they had a great father and they would be fine, after all wasn't free-agency a part of his plan. A response of great humor and joy surrounded me and he said "I'd expect you to argue for your own case!" I was overwhelmed by how intimately he knew me. Then he told me that he needed to show me something else. What he showed me was my husband's death! 

My husband died four years later in an accident. Upon seeing this I agreed to return and raise my sons but not before asking for a promise that I could return. I received that promise. Then the savior said to me remember that all you can bring back with you when you return is the love you give and life on earth is about loving relationships. I then found myself entering back into my body opening my eyes and laughing out loud with JOY! After this experience I asked my doctor if I had died and his response was well you very well could have. I told him a little bit about what had happened and he said he didn't want to hear it but that he knew I thought it was real. He and I were very close friends. I forgot about the part of my husbands death when I returned but six weeks before his accident I saw it in a very lucid dream and kept trying to change the outcome. I couldn't. I told my husband about it and he said forget it I'll be fine. He wasn't and six weeks later the accident happened just as I had seen it.